lion roars are not as powerful as some guy named frank with a trash can
"SOME GUY NAMED FRANK"
|—||something lovely my therapist said (via sexual-feelings)|
Shockwave’s happy place. (From Transformers: Exodus by Alex Irvine)
it bothers me that Kansas and Arkansas are not pronounced the same
I’m from the UK and I have been pronouncing Arkansas as Ar-Kansas my whole life
For all my non-american friends, Arkansas is pronounced ark-an-saw
I think I was in my early twenties before I realised that Arkansas (written) and Arcansaw (spoken) were the same place.
While I can now safely say that if someone says “Arcansaw” to me I know that they mean Arkansas, to this day I when I see Arkansas written down, my mind says “Ar-kansas”.
When you suffer from mental illness, you cannot always on your mind and the thought processes that govern it to be rational. I know that is pretty much a given, so, please, hold off on your “Hail, Prince of the Obvious” cheers and bear with me.
Quite often, when we’re not at the stages of our illness that cause this to be true, we are incredibly aware of this fact. Sometimes we can talk about our issues quite openly; how they make us feel, how they make no sense. Sometimes, we can even be at the point that we can actually joke about our own issues; not all of us do, but some of us do for varying reasons: sometimes it’s to put our friends at ease and let them know that it’s ok to talk about it with us at that point, sometimes it’s nothing more than a coping mechanism - laughing because if we didn’t then we’d be brought down low just by thinking about the fact that they were there. (I do this last one a lot, because I feel guilty about my mental illness.) I know that the above is not the case for everyone, but it’s common enough for you to be aware of it.
Now, this is all well and good. This is how we, those who deal with mental illness on a daily basis, cope and react with our difficulties.However, for those of you who are loved ones, friends, family, acquaintances or even just simple co-workers, you have to understand that your thought processes do not work in the same way. And our actions do not automatically give you the right to act the same way.
- Just because we make light of our mental illness sometimes doesn’t mean that you can turn it into a running joke.
- Just because you hear us say that we wish we could just stop being depressed or anxious etc doesn’t mean that you can tell us to do exactly that.
- And just because we say we feel lonely doesn’t mean that when we withdraw because we’re miserable doesn’t mean that you can berate us for not reaching out or not talking to people when we should have done.
Because, when we’re at the stage when our mental illness has a hold of us, then all those other “rational” statements have been tossed to the wind.
I’ve been in some incredibly dark places recently and when the light starts to shine again and people ask me how I am and I tell them why I’ve been quiet, then usually I get the same sort of message back: “You could have spoken to me.” “You should have told me, I’d have helped.” “Why didn’t you say something, you know I’m always here for you?”
And I feel guilty. I feel like I’ve betrayed my friends, I feel like somehow I’ve let them down by not coming to them when I’m upset. I feel like I have made them sad because I didn’t let them help me. And while I know that their statements aren’t intended to have that effect, they do and that makes me even more miserable.
The thing is, I am speaking to you as soon as I am able. I’m telling you at the first opportunity I have. I’m saying something as soon as I actually believe that you’ll give a damn. Because before this moment, I didn’t think anyone would.
Depression and anxiety cuts you off from other people. All that rational knowledge about how you know that there are people who are there for you, that you aren’t alone in this, all that knowledge and the thought processes that follow it are gone. I don’t know where they go, because they always come back afterwards - a little bloodied and bruised perhaps, but nevertheless intact. But they are gone.
Even the knowledge that it is our depression and anxiety which is making us feel so alone and isolated is temporarily lost. All memory of ever having this knowledge is gone too. Most, if not all, of our “healthy” coping mechanisms are gone leaving us only with our irrational thoughts and, quite often, an inability to prevent the behaviour that comes from these thoughts.
So we don’t just “feel” like we’re alone and that no-one cares. We are certain of this fact, we can prove it to ourselves, and usually seem to take quite a lot of morbid delight in doing so. Most of the time I end up proving to myself that the only people who could ever possibly love me are my parents, who have no choice, and my cats. A few years ago, I didn’t even believe that, so was it any surprise that I saw no point in going on and tried to act on that belief?
What I’m trying to say isn’t solely for the benefit of those who are currently living in the grip of mental health issues, though I do hope that there are some others out there who will feel something in this resonate within themselves and realise they they are not alone in feeling the way they do. Sometimes merely seeing something you feel being put into words which you had never thought of can really help you come to terms with what is happening, if only for a short while.
No, mostly this message is for those who have some sort of relationship with someone who has mental health issues, be it familial, friendly, romantic, passing or working. No-one is asking you to walk on eggshells around people with mental illness, because no-one likes to be made to feel like a pariah. Try to keep in mind that, just like everyone else, the person you spoke with yesterday may not be the same person you speak with today, and the rational side of them you know may not be in control. A lot of the things you may say won’t be believed, or may even make things worse, no matter your intent.
We want your friendship, we want your support. Hell, we need both of these things, but a lot of the time we will never ask because we feel certain that we will never get it. When it is offered, we may not even believe that it is meant truthfully - this isn’t some sort of judgement on your character, merely a demonstration of the irrationality that is governing us. It can be distressing, I know, but please don’t give up.
Because when we don’t even have ourselves, you are literally all that we have.
YES.YES.YES. People need to realise this
This belongs more on Facebook than it does on tumblr.
i think you’re missing out on some of tumblr then… but it should be on facebook too, it should be on every social media site!
"A new study shows that men are threatened by confident women taking pictures of themselves, and call these women stupid, socially inept, and ugly. In other news, the world is round, the sky is blue, and the patriarchy is still shitty."
Pacific Rim Bomber Jackets (X)
I know what I want for Christmas. I knooooooooowwwww. Also I want to get married soley so that me and my husband can buy matching Cherno Alpha jackets.
Yet they claim that the queer community is overly sexual and puts our sex lives out there. Straight people are weird.
enforcing heterosexuality for one thing and putting sexualized abuse bullshit on your fucking baby???? wtf is wrong with you people
using a baby as a billboard to promote parents’ love of 50 shades is sick, no way around it.
Ah, fanart. Also known as the art that girls make.
Sad, immature girls no one takes seriously. Girls who are taught that it’s shameful to be excited or passionate about anything, that it’s pathetic to gush about what attracts them, that it’s wrong to be a geek, that they should feel embarrassed about having a crush, that they’re not allowed to gaze or stare or wish or desire. Girls who need to grow out of it.
That’s the art you mean, right?
Because in my experience, when grown men make it, nobody calls it fanart. They just call it art. And everyone takes it very seriously.
I don’t have a gif that properly encapsulates the level of “THIS” present in this response. Bravo.
Fox News headlines v. real headlines, part 2425183.
The brunette part is really important.
coded racist language for the fail
Love the scare quotes around “”“pansexual”“”.
Like, I can see the Fox Newsroom writers being like…
"This democrat says she’s a…. pa..pansexual? Is that a thing?"
"I don’t know, Jenkins. Never heard of it. Sounds made-up. Write up a story and put quotations around the word until we have time to fact check it….
HAHAHAHAAA just kidding. We don’t fact check.”